I don't know how we had the strength to leave FW for a night, but we did it. NYE we traveled home to see family and friends and I must say it was a very emotional time for me. I had not been home since October 27, 2008. I did not really want to come home, but for several reasons we decided a quick trip home would be best. Saying good-bye to our son on Wed. was so difficult. I know he has no concept of time or that we are going home, but it killed me to leave his bedside that day. It was one of the few times that he was really awake and looking at me and responding to my voice and touch. I felt it was as if he was telling me it was ok to go home ... I had said I was not going to come home until I could bring him with me. I knew entering our home would be more than difficult for me. Since Danny and the kids had been home before during my stay in FW, it was not as difficult for them. I entered our living room and broke down. I never dreamed it would affect me so hard. And now, I don't want to leave. My whole world revolves in these walls and we have so many memories here in this house. I am just more than ready to bring Kadin home and begin the rest of our lives.
Robbi had a bunch of friends over for NYE. One of her buddies, Eddie, walked in the door and was sssoooo surprised to see me. He gave me the biggest hug and I cried like a baby. He kept giving me hugs all night long, bless his heart. I just love that kid. I knew when all the girls arrived because the screams were probably heard for blocks! Since we are not far from the sheriff's office, I figured someone from there would be visiting us soon! Anyway ... we rang in the new year with my sister and nephew and all the kids outside! JT is with us also, which is really nice since he is such a busy teenager and we don't see him as often as we would like. Everyone else went to bed but Dakota decided he wanted to try to see New Year's Day thru the end, lol. We argued about it for a little while. I won! YAY ME! Robbi stayed with Anna and tonight at 11PM is the first time we had seen her since then! I don't mind as long as she is happy and having fun!
I was so draggin rear this morning though when Joe called to get Dakota. Since Dakota had been up til past 3 (well ok, arguing with mom about not wanting to sleep!) getting only about 4 hours of sleep was not near enough for him ... or me for that matter, so he slept until about 9:30 and got up. Joe got him a .22 rifle (Davey Crickett, it is the cutest little thing!) for Christmas so every chance that he gets, he takes Dakota to the gun range. Dakota has been asking me if I will go watch him shoot, so today was that day. JT and I went to the gun range and had a great time. We all took turns hitting the targets. It was great fun ... I forgot how much I loved to shoot. I had not done it in a long while - maybe about 12 years! JT's grandpa taught me how many years ago. Every chance he got, he took me outside for some target practice and actually said I was the best aiming girl he had ever known! Quite flattering for him to say that ... never lost my eye, either. Dakota lined out the ammo ... 2 for his daddy, 2 for him, 2 for his bubba, and 2 for mommy ... but somehow it ended up being like 8 for Dakota and one here and there for the rest of us. It was good fun. We really had a good time.
After that we went to my folks house - THANKS FOR THE COMFORT FOOD MOM! I have not seen my mom in a couple of months either. It was emotional to put my arms around her tiny frame. Of course, my sister is just that ... MY SISTER! She is a nut. She and Cam are living in our home to take care of it til we come home and we are sssooooooooo grateful! I woke Dad up from his nap to get a hug. I guess overall, shedding all the tears in the last couple of days has been good for me. I sense it has given me strength to endure the next 8 weeks. I little touch from home may have been just what we needed. Mom made us baked ham, black-eyed peas, corn, mashed taters, rolls, bbq little wiennies and omg a CHOCOLATE CAKE ...my downfall. I drank my first DP in several days. Trying not to do that.
We are about to get on the road in less than an hour. JT is going to a Texas Tech game with his dad tomorrow so he will be picking him up at our suite. I don't want to have to go back to life as we know it there, but for Kadin, I will do ANYTHING. I can't wait to see his precious little face again.
We have called several times since we have been home and there have been no real changes for him. He is now 4 pounds 0.2 ounces and tonight he was weened on his pressures a little bit because his gas came back EXCELLENT! It's what we have been waiting for. Kadin is the King .... he runs this show so we just have to wait on him and take what we can get. I can smell him even now.
We have hopefully good things in store for Danny tomorrow, but I will write about that later. Right now I have to go extract the liquid gold and then get on the road. Happy New Year to my family and friends . . . . .
Leslie
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